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给爸爸的一封信
浏览次数:5230     添加时间:2006/5/15

Dear Dad:

        最近还顺利吧?不用想,您一定是非常的忙。

        我在美国一切都好!您一定听说了我从公寓搬出去了,现在住在朋友家客厅。好像这已经成了一个规律,在每个学业阶段的最后一年,我总会搬迁。初三时,我迁居美国,高三时搬进了John的家,大四时又住进朋友家客厅。但我一点也不介意,还觉得很有趣。

       我又开始自己做饭了。同住的朋友也是做饭高手,为了做出各种美食,我俩每周都去买菜。我在这里已经住了三周,但到现在为止,我们没吃过重复的一餐。每天都能吃到不一样的饭菜。朋友有洁癖,我还得注意保持厨房的一尘不染。

       LSAT(法学院入学考试)真的很难考。第二次的考试成绩仅比第一次好一点。距离我的目标分数还差一大截,但做最后的冲刺的时间还剩不到四周,这使我倍感压力。因为我必须在参加学校暑假课程或LSAT暑期授课这两个之中做出选择。如果我选择了后者,我就不能选修社会学了,这样的话我就变成了主修法律与社会,选修就只有哲学了。

       我就此向法学院做了咨询,他们建议我放弃社会学的选修,因为LSAT成绩在将来成绩单上更有分量。

       因此我决定如果不能取得理想分数,我将放弃选修社会学。但若成绩好的话,我就在6月12号参加LSAT暑期授课。

       在最近的日子里,对人生有许多感悟。
       数日前,当LSAT、期中考试、教会、朋友、公寓问题、经济问题这一切压得我踹不过气来时,我出去走了走。越走心情越糟。我感到处处不如人、低人一等。我不擅长推理、社交,体?|比别人弱。LSAT考试成绩不理想,学业上也处于落后状态,周围一切都让我感到压抑。我想我是很难走出这种困境了。于是,我瘫坐在路边的凳子上,喊着向上帝求助。一群鸟儿飞过我的头顶,看着空中的鸟儿,我告诉上帝,我要是是一只鸟就好了,那么无忧无虑,没有烦恼、压力。只要成天飞翔,享受生活就好。当鸟儿飞出了我的视野,却把远山、地平线、头顶之上的云彩、环绕的绿树拉入眼帘,我发现身边的小花上,趴着一只小小的虫子。

       我认识到,一切都会好起来的。因为对上帝来说,我比所有这些事物加起来更宝贵。如果空中的鸟儿毫无顾虑,不担心未来之事,为什么我要担心呢?不是还有上帝眷顾着我吗?我还认识到,我是这个庞大的生态系统和由动植物、大气、星球组成的生物世界中的一分子。我只是浩瀚苍穹中的微不足道的一粒小小尘埃。

       和其它一切比起来,第二天的期中考试、LSAT预考显得不再那么的重要。我能做好这些,我会尽我最大的努力。即使考试没通过了,也没有什么大不了。没有人要求我一定要成功,但一定要为之付出过努力。

       我们现在生活的这个世界只是我们的临时居所。GPA和LSAT成绩只是把我们带到终点的方式。如果我得了高分却失去了人生的价值,又有什么用呢?得到了,但转瞬即逝,又能怎么样呢?

       “一个人丢弃他所不能持守的,得到无人可夺去的,他绝不是傻瓜。”(译者注:1956年被奥卡(Auca)的印第安人杀害的殉道士吉姆.艾利奥特(Jim Elliot)所说。和耶稣所说「一个人就是赢得了全世界,却赔上了自己的生命,有什么益处呢?」(马太福音16章26节)异曲同工。)
希望我的所感所悟能助您减轻压力!

愿主保佑您。
儿子:Joseph Tsang
敬上

 

Dear Dad:

How are things going over there for you? I'm sure you are still very busy with everything. Well I'm doing well here in the states. I'm sure you've heard that i moved out of my apartment. Now I'm living in the living room of my friends apartment. This seems to always happen to me in my last year of any
institutioal life. My last year of middle school i moved to the U.S, last year of high school move into my John's house, and last year of college live in the
living room. But i don't mind, its actually fun.

I'm starting to cook alot again. The firend I'm living with is also a good cook, so we go shopping every week for different dishes to make. So far living here for three weeks i have not made a duplicate dish. Everyday is something new. He is also a clean freak, so I am learning how to keep the kitchen spotless.

LSAT is really tough. This second test i took i only improve me a little. I am still 45% away from the score that i want. ANd i only have less than 4 weeks
left to improve my score. I have been stressing over this because now i have to choose between summer school or taking another session of LSAT class during the summer. But if i don't take the summer classes then i can't minor in sociology, and will just be left with a Philosophy and Law and Society Major.

I asked the counselors at law school administration and they recommend me to drop the sociology minor becuase that does not weigh in to the academic index as much as the LSAT score.

So right now my conclusion is that if i don't get the score I am aiming for then i will drop sociology, but if my score is good then i will take my LSAT in June 12.

Ive been learning a lot recently abotu life.  Couple days ago just when i was overwhelmed by all the LSAT study, midterm, church, friends, apartment issue, and financial issue, i went to take a walk. The more i walked the worst i felt about myself because of my inferiority and incompetence compared to other people. I am not as logical, weaker in body, less social then others. I'm lagging behind in LSAT, can't catch up with school work, and am just overwhelmed by everything around me. I don't think i can cut it. Then when i collapsed on a bench and just cried to GOd for help a pack of birds flew by above me. I saw the birds in the air, and i told GOd how i wished i could just be a bird. Without trouble, without worry, without anxiety, and without pressure. I could just fly and enjoy life. Then as the birds flew out of my sight, i saw the distant mountains, and then the distant horizon, and the clouds above me, and the trees around me, and lastely the little flower before me with a little insect crawling on it.

I realized that everything is going to be okay. Because i am of more value to GOd than all of these things combined. ANd if the birds of the air do not
care and is not burdened with the future, why should i, will not God take care of me? Furthermore, i realized i was part of a giant ecosystem and a
biological world that consists of animals, plants, insects, atmospheres, and planets. I am but a small, tiny, dust according to the bigger picture. Putting
everything thing else in perspective, i realize the midterm the next day, and the LSAT prep is just not as important and daunting any more. I can do this. I will do my best and if i fail it will still be okay. I am not required to succeed. I am only required to try.

This world we live in is but temporary. The GPA and LSAT score but a means to an end. What use is it if i gained the scores but failed as a human being. What use would i have gained if i gained what was soon to be lost.

"A man is no fool to give what he can not keep to gain what he can not lose."

I hope this lesson may relieve some of your stress and your concerns.

God Bless.
Your Son,

Joseph Tsang

 

 

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